An elf, sure.
|(What? What does your tooth fairy look like?)|
I can't explain my aversion to the EB, but it runs deep. It could be because he looks crazier than hell in most pictures:
And to be clear, I like rabbits. In fact, if I woke up and saw Bugs Bunny in my room, I would be
While thinking about the Easter Bunny this week, I wondered if this was the strangest Easter custom in any culture. I mean, does it get weirder than a giant hare sneaking into your house at night and leaving you a basket of eggs?
Check these out:
Whip 'Yer Woman (or Fifty Shades of Easter)
If the women in your life are anything like the women in mine, I would suggest not sharing this custom. In fact, I would suggest not even mentioning it.
If You Can't Whip Yer Woman, Douse Her With Water
The Polish and Hungarians have an Easter tradition called Smingus-Dyngus--say that out loud and
you will agree that it is the most fun word combo EVER--which involves soaking a woman with buckets of water. Legend says if the girl is soaked, then she will be married in the upcoming year. What I am saying here is that you basically just find a bucket of water and dump right on a woman. I would suggest yelling, "SMINGUS-DYNGUS!" as you release the water, just for the proper effect.
I have to say, I really want to incorporate Smingus-Dyngus into my Easter celebrations. Not only for the spectacle of it, but also to be able to yell, "Smingus-Dyngus!"
The Easter Witch
Instead of, "Trick or Treat," the traditional greeting is, "Virvon, varvon, tuoreeks terveeks, tulevaks vuodeks; vitsa sulle, palkka mulle!" which means, "I wave a twig for a fresh and healthy year ahead; a twig for you, a treat for me!" It isn't as catchy as "Trick or Treat," and most Americans are too lazy to say something that long in return for a Jolly Rancher, but with some tweaks, we could be on to something here, people. Free candy about six months after Halloween? Perfect!
So while we Americans are stuck with a creepy, human-sized rabbit, you can see the traditions could be worse, especially if you are an Eastern European woman. At least our kids get candy and chocolate without being beaten or soaked. Although, I would like to try this Australian treat. It is a chocolate Bilby, but to me it just looks like a chocolate pregnant rabbit:
Whatever your Easter traditions, I hope you and yours have a wonderful day and remember the true reason for the day.