Wednesday, July 4, 2012

A Tattoo By Any Other Name Is...

Trust me, I am no grammar Nazi.  I often find cringe-worthy mistakes in essays I have written, revised, reworked, and submitted to publishers.  More often than not, you have to read between the lines and fill in left out words to make any sense of my Facebook status or Tweets. I do, however, have a passable grasp on what I find hard to believe could STILL be problematic grammar errors such as "your" and "you're."

Reading a person's grammar mistakes does not rub me so wrong that I go all "Gordon Ramsey eats an undercooked scallop" over it like does many of my friends, but that is only when the error is on paper or online.  If the mistake is made on something permanent, oh say my body, then I would totally go bat shit crazy on the violator.

I recently read that a lady in Nova Scotia sued a local tattoo parlor for misspelling the word "crossroads" on her stomach.  The judge found in her favor and demanded that the tattoo studio pay her $9,000 to have the tattoo removed.  To her I say, "Bravo!"

Link to the News Story

I can not imagine having to go through life with anything misspelled on my person.  I have a tattoo that I had done in 1997.  Even then, I knew my luck well enough to know not to have any words, Chinese characters, or anything else that could be misinterpreted applied to myself.  I went with a simple yin-yang on the front of my left hip.  I would snap a photo of the tattoo for you except my 27-year old self could not foresee that his 41-year old older self would weigh an additional 100 pounds, thus forming a ginormous fat roll that completely covers the tat.  On the bright side, if I ever lose weight, the tattoo will be fresh and unfaded from all the years of protection from any light.

While there is a great injustice to receiving a bad tattoo, and I am all for that poor Canadian girl getting $9K to have hers removed, let's be honest.  If it didn't happen to us, it is damn funny to see.  It is an unexpected treat, one that can not easily be dismissed.  One that should not be dismissed.

So without further ado, let's take a gander at my top 10 bad tattoos:

10. There is nothing misspelled here, but it sooo isn't right.

9.  For some reason, I don't think this fella needed a tattoo to tell us he was white trash.
8. I'm glad this dude is hugged up to another dude, because he may have a hard time finding tits.

7.  I am not sure what Juge-ing is, but I hope only God does it.
6.  Yes, it does.  It go's and go's and go's.
5.  Well, maybe regret ONE thing...
4. I must say I misspell this word a lot, only NOT ON MY FREAKING LEG.
3.  Since you say so, I will not waste my time on you.
2.  I am! I am s'jalous I could die!
1 1/2. You are awsome. Tottlly.
1. The Winner! Oh, sweet, sweet pee. I feel that way sometimes when I have to go really really bad and finally get to a bathroom.

Please excuse any misspellings on this post. ;-)


  1. You should not expose your tattoo to direct sunlight for at least a month and even after that you should cover it with sun block. Too much exposure of the tattoo to the sun can result in the fading of the tattoo.
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